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A Beautiful Closure for this Volunteer by Tara Moon, NYZCCC Foundations Graduate
I was a contemplative care volunteer at a hospice near Boston when a family brought in their father, Gary. While he was wasting away with Lou Gehrig’s Disease, he still had that life-enhancing twinkle in his eyes.
Over a month’s time we shared many quiet moments together. Though I don’t usually work on Sundays, for some reason on one Sunday I decided to visit Chilton House. I talked and laughed with Gary and his family. As I left I said, “See you Tuesday, Gary.” He looked at me with his big smile and said, “I’ll be waiting for you.”
On Tuesday, he was waiting for me. Except that he had died a few hours earlier. The nurse on duty saw me come in and said, “Tara, we are just waiting for the funeral home to come and take Gary’s body away. You go in and sit with him.”
And so I did. I said the prayers that, from my spiritual training, I believed to be helpful at that auspicious time. I said his favorite prayers. I spoke to him and wished him well. When the young man from the funeral home arrived, I helped transfer Ron’s body onto the rolling cart. I zipped up the body bag and rolled the cart to the hearse. I waved my friend “good-bye for now.” I went back to Gary’s room, and, with the nurses, I cleaned it and prepared a memorial altar. And then I cried.
I had an experience of “closure” with Gary that I naively thought I would have with most of my patients. That has not been the case. All too often, I will walk into the hospice only to find out that one of my patients had died the day before, or hours before—and I walk into an empty room, devoid not only of the being who passed away, but all the worldly belongings; the family photos, the flowers, the favorite pieces of artwork. And it is jarring, somehow. I lessen it by remaining in the room to pray for the person. That helps somewhat. I wish to create a way within this hospice that all volunteers can have their moment of felt grief. It is our chance to share with our fellow volunteers, and to then let go more easily. That is my next step.
Tara Moon is a graduate of the NYZCCC 2008-09 Foundations in Buddhist Contemplative Care Program, and as her final project she gathered entries from the journal she had been keeping throughout her year as a contemplative care volunteer at the Visiting Nurses Association hospice residence in Needham, Mass.
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DEDICATED TRAINING SPACE NEEDED
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The New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care is looking for a new location. We have outgrown our present space at 80 East 11th Street and our rented spaces for our training programs. In the Fall, we are expanding to offer four year-long training programs in caregiving, as well as our regular weekly programs. At the moment, all our workshops, public education and trainings are held at various rental locations. Our administration and consultations are held in a separate office suite. While we are looking to realize our vision of a permanent home for the Center--including the end-of -life guest house--we need an interim space where we could expand our offerings, provide more direct care, train more people and increase our public education programs. Ideally, we are looking for 3,000 + square feet in the Union Square/Flatiron/Greenwhich Village/Soho areas—centrally located to public transportation and near our partner Beth Israel Medical Center. We are hoping for a donated or subsidized loft space. This new space will enable us to offer a 60 seat (or greater) meditation room, two/three consulting rooms, office, library, classroom, kitchen and multi-purpose common area. In an effort to better serve the needs of our caregivers and the New York City community, we ask for your support. All offers and/or leads are welcome.
Please contact us at: info@zencare.org.
Make a tax deductible donation to support our work helping others. You can do that here.
 We need a large (15” +) Japanese Wooden Mokugyo for our retreats and offerings. It would look similar to the one pictured here.
 We need a donation of 2 new Mac Book Pros. If you can offer these wishes, please email us at info@zencare.org.
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Make a Donation to New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care
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Our mission is to make accessible, the wisdom, compassion and equanimity of the Buddha both locally and globally by: Creating and operating an end-of-life care residence within a larger Dharma center. To mindfully and compassionately serve people approaching death. To support the dying, their family and friends. To train volunteers, staff, monastics and medical professionals the ways of attending to the sick and dying from a Buddhist perspective. Attending to residents physical, emotional and spiritual needs cognizant of the fact that death is an integral experience of life. To provide the larger community, educational programs with a foundation in Buddhist teachings. To offer daily meditation practice, workshops and teachings from visiting Dharma teachers and Healthcare professionals. Your tax deductible donation will go toward making our vision a reality.
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